Thanksgiving

     Wednesday afternoon and I am nearly finished packing.  It is with heavy heart that I pack to leave the wonderful people of Honduras.
     I have been given the extraordinary gift of not one but 3 very special going away celebrations!  Clearly far more than I deserve, and am most humbled and honored by everyone's special outpouring of love and encouragement.  Many Bible verses have been quoted on the value of friendship, many songs have been sung by staff, teachers, and children about love and friendship.  Today at El Cordero the tiniest of the nursery folk sang "Jesus Loves Me" mostly in English!  Each grade level had a special presentation they had been working on.  Then I was presented with two beautifully engraved plaques, one mostly appropriately dedicated to Holy Family, without whose help and support I could never have had the pleasure of serving here for the past three months.  It is through their generosity that I have been able to buy and demonstrate many teacher resource materials.  The church members and my friends have diligently watched my house, cat, car and property while I have been away.   I've had the pleasure of seeing the eyes of both the teachers and the children light up with pleasure and delight when using many of the methods and materials I've introduced.   That is my reward.  To see their excitement in learning has been my great delight.
     The care and love with which they have sent me off deserves a special mention.  The teachers and staff made decorations, the children and teachers made hand made thank you cards and much attention was given in saying thank you in song and verse, hugs and cards, and, of course, a few tears along the way.  I think we can learn from them not about gratitude, but about giving fully of oneself to someone else.  The heart, the dedication, the toil, the time, and the sincerity of saying thank you and please come back is not to be taken lightly.  I think we would all be better off  by taking some significant time to tell each other just precisely how much we appreciate all the care and love that has gone into the work they do, whether it is family or co workers.  I know that being the recipient of so much attention is not easy for me, but the feelings run deep and strong and I am most honored by that all that was said.  And what else could I do but promise to return?  Next time knowing more Spanish so I could be a bit more productive!
     It is with heavy heart that I leave so many friends.  The LAMB organization is my extended family now and I will pray for their safety and well being every day.  Dilcia, the young woman who translated for me, told me that her brother has been shot at and attempts have been made on his life for his motorcycle.  she has been robbed at knife point, and her family have been witnesses to murder in the streets.  She lives in the poorest part of Tegucigalpa, and has lived with this violence for all her life.  Yet she is intelligent to the point of having a scholarship to go to a college in Wisconsin for two years!  She deserves the chance to finish college and make a better life for herself and her family.  Maribel, the young woman I wrote about in an earlier blog, is still living in danger and poverty.  Her future is very uncertain at this point.  She made a surprise visit to Casa LAMB yesterday reselling some shoes she had acquired.  At least she is trying to stay away from the drug culture she had once been a part of.  The director of the school where I spent most of my time was asking for prayers for her husband.  He has an engineering degree and had a job, but was fired 3 months ago and still has no prospects.  Two of the teachers there have or will have new babies to try to support on the less than minimum wage they earn there.  There are teacher strikes in the public schools that have been going on most of the three months I have been here.  No resolution is in sight.  Meanwhile, children are not being educated.  I do not know what will happen to the family we took food to last weekend.  They have enough food for a month or more, but then what?  There is still so much to do, and so many people in dire need.  Caring, loving, strong and gifted people who deserve more than the scraps they have been thrown.
      With so much more to do, and so many opportunities to serve, how can I leave?  How can I sleep in my spacious house and have so much and so many privileges?   I do know I will be back and will serve again as long as I can.  When the world was hurting and in so much pain Jesus came into the world.  He didn't eradicate all sickness and poverty.  For most of his ministry, he helped, one person at a time.  That is my model. and I will serve one at a time for as long as I can. 
    

God Provides

Are you sure that miracles don't happen any more?  I just had a front row seat in experiencing one.
     Maria, a part of Suzy's extended family, is a Lencan Honduran.  She has a little girl named Evelyn, who will soon be 3 years old.  They live with Suzy and her girls.  She comes from a tiny village in Lenca territory, called La Paz.  A few days ago she was talking with Amanda and told her there was a famine in her family's area and people were starving.  She has a 7 month old nephew who was getting weak from lack of food.  Amanda was ready to go get food and take it to them.  When she asked if I wanted to go along,  I was all for that.  We went to a super store, similar to a Sam's Club, or Costco, and bought about 250 pounds of staples-corn meal flour, called maseca, rice, red beans, baby formula powder, and several other staples.  Saturday morning we loaded up the car and Mari, Maria, little Evelyn, Amanda and I were off.
     Maria had told us vaguely that her family lives outside Marcala, in the La Paz Dept. of Honduras.  La Paz is where the indigenous Lencas have lived for hundreds of years.  We were ready, we thought for anything, but the goal was to deliver the food as quickly as possible.  We drove to Marcala without incident.  As we were eating lunch we tried to get clearer directions of where to go from there.  Maria had been there many times, but only  by bus, as she doesn't drive and doesn't have a car.  So I can understand why her directions were hazy at best.  What we couldn't get clear was how far from town it was and exactly how we would actually get to the house.from the town of Marcala.  Well, Amanda went next door, to a gun shop no less, to ask for help to get the food delivered.  No less than a Red Cross volunteer was working there and she volunteered another Red Cross volunteer to drive the food there in the Red Cross truck!  His name is Israel and he was as helpful and cheerful a young man as you can imagine.  He drove us and the food there-a journey we had thought might be a few minutes turned into an hour and a half on dirt roads.  Maria suddenly called out stop! and we said where?  It was in the middle of nothing visible but trees and hillsides.  Israel stopped the truck and we looked for a house.  Turns out the house we were looking for was down a steep ravine that dropped precariously in places.  Undaunted, Israel put 100 pounds of maseca on his shoulders and scampered down the ravine (off the roadside and into the woods) and made 4 trips while Amanda, Mari, and I took a single tiny load cautiously down the hillside and into the house.  Once there we noticed, without looking too carefully, there was not a scrap of anything resembling food to be found in the two room house.  It was neat, but barren of anything edible.  The journey up into the mountains had been considerably longer than we had anticipated, but the amazing thing is that we had no idea of how to get there, and yet God provided.  Israel was exactly what we needed at the exact moment we needed it.  He was strong and sure footed and an excellent driver.  He was friendly and accommodating and happy to be useful.  What a wonderful day it was.  The best thing of all is that Maria's family got the food that was so needed.  The baby desperately needed the formula we brought, as he was a seven month old the size of a small 3 month old.  I don't think he could have weighed 12 pounds.and the others really needed that food.  In all it had been about a 6 hour trip, one way, and worth every minute of it.  Best of all is how people just came to our aid at the precise minute it was needed.  We could never had taken all that food down steep hillside by ourselves.  It was not a trip carefully orchestrated in advance down to the last the most minute detail.  We just had a general idea of getting food to people in need.  God showed the way in the guise of the Red Cross volunteers at the gun shop and Israel and the truck.  We didn't and couldn't have planned it that way. 
     This is not the first time God has provided.  I was not always so quick it recognize it as God's work.  Many times in my life I could have easily been ineffective or even harmed by being too ignorant or naive in my actions.  There have been times I didn't see the miracle of God sending me help when I needed it or that the  someone who stepped in or "just happened" to be where I needed someone to be was God's work.  I am glad God is teaching me to see with eyes of faith.  Thanks be to God!  Miracles do happen..  God does provide.
 

Zip Lining

    Last week Amanda and I headed off a much needed change of pace and setting.  We chose Copan for its history and to see the marvelous ruins still being excavated.  We also knew it was beautiful and a major attraction for many tourists.  We saw many of those attractions, tropical birds, museums, and ate in fine restaurants.  Despite nearly collapsing in the heat and humidity I thoroughly enjoyed our stay and was very glad we had chosen Copan.
   One of our options during those few days was to do a "canopy tour."  When I think of that term I immediately conjure pictures of a tropical rain forest just inches below the viewing area and a short and breezy flight over the tree tops.  If you fall there are trees barely beneath your feet to break your fall, right?  Not exactly!  This was 14 courses of yards, meters, and miles (REALLY!) of cable stretched tautly between valleys and over a river!  This was no granny or sissy site seeing event.
      I now know why they call it zip lining.  One zips along at break neck speed.  To slow down one does the intuitive opposite by pulling down on the cable behind you to break.  Before you go up to the top, you get outfitted with harness, cable, pulley, helmet and a very brief sample ride along a ten foot line that is pretty much horizontal.  OK.  Ready to go!  I feel what it is like to be weightless for 2 seconds and think I can do this!  After all, I used to enjoy roller coaster rides at Six Flags-even the completely 360 degree ones.  Well, the whole trip was breath taking, and I let loose with some squeals and shrieks and enjoyed heart pounding views of the Honduran mountain area around Copan.  The city and the ruins lay far beneath us.  There was enough air between the cable and us and the trees for a small plane to fly through.
.      I thought of my experiences on that zip line wondering what I can learn from them regarding my life.  How does it relate or compare to my experiences here in Honduras?  How does that inform my Christian life?  Suzy has told of swinging out over the precipice for God.  When there is a need, she does not first ask, can we do it?  How will we pay for it?  What will the cost be?  What hurdles must be jumped to accomplish it?  She says, where you lead, Lord, I will follow, and steps out in faith to do what God is calling her to do.  Her work and the LAMB mission is testament to her faith and God's leadership.  The lives saved and improved bear witness to God's love.
    My own experience here is different, yet very instructive for me.  I have been harnessed and helmeted in safety here, with guides to smooth the way through everything I have done or experienced here at Casa LAMB, in the schools, during shopping trips, running errands, even visiting Copan last week and riding that zip line and touring the ancient Mayan ruins.  I have never felt threatened or endangered in the least.  I knew that my harness was firmly buckled on and I was safe in God's hands.  I felt the prayers of my fellow parishioners back home and new friends here and sheltering arms around my shoulders at every turn.
    I think of Maribel and Fernando on their own again, trying to make it in a dangerous world, and
Francesca in her fragile home, robbed last week of her few possessions while staying in the hospital with her daughter.  I think of the Mayan Chorti children in their village, and the beggars on the streets of Tegucigalpa.  I think of the orphans and trafficked young girls locked away in misery and exploitation.   Where is their safety harness as they swing through the air with no solid ground under their feet?  Where is their shield and their helmet?  Where is their support?  Do they know there is a loving God who cares and wants them safe in His arms?  Where is their guide?  We each have a part to play in this work. Knowing that our safety harness is firmly buckled on in the arms of God's love, can we do less than step out in faith?

Risk and Acceptance

I am beginning the book, The Hole in Our Gospel, and I feel jerked up short.  I worry about some things I am seeing here, and wonder what can I do and how?  The need is so great and resources so short.  Then I witnessed a great occasion for real  and genuine Christian love.
Mirabel is the young woman who is Lucy's mother, Suzy's youngest adopted daughter, now with 19 month old Fernando and another on the way.  A recent ultrasound showed it is a girl.  She has had a tragic life on the streets and has experienced horrors that no one can truly imagine, nor should ever have to.  Mirabel was abandoned as a tiny child and she has had to make her own way in the underworld of Tegucigalpa.  Recently Suzy and Amanda took her in to live at Casa LAMB for awhile, until something better could be found for her.  She accepted Jesus in her life in very moving circumstances.  For awhile she tried to adapt to a drastically different way of life.  But yesterday she snapped.  She became out of control with emotions we can only guess at, and made the decision to go back out on her own.  The worrying part of it is that she has Fernando, very severely underweight at 10% of the norm, and only 22 pounds, and the new baby on the way.  It is possible she has pregnancy related diabetes, so her health and the health of her unborn child is at risk.  Amanda spent a whole day Monday taking her and Fernando to doctors and getting medicine for both of them.  The cost to LAMB was a full month's wages for minimum wage earners here-about $350.  Even that is much more than Mirabel has access to-there are no social services for those in poverty here.  The regimen the pediatrician prescribed for Fernando is stringent and complicated, and expensive.  How will she manage on her own?  What is Fernando's fate?
What complicates things even more is her depressed state.  I think it must be very hard to suddenly be the recipient of so much generosity-even in Christian love-without fearing what strings may be attached?  I think it may feel embarrassing  and frightening to be in such great need with nothing to give back.  The idea of someone offering help just because someone needs it must be overwhelming in the extreme for some recipients.  When a person has never experienced anything but exploitation and misery, how can a sense of trust be established?  I have a lot more questions than answers.  I really cannot put myself in her shoes and try to see things from her point of view.
I have seen Amanda and Suzy with both of them over time and up close.  They have nothing but the best for her in mind.  They have gone to great lengths to show that being a Christian means acting as Christ's hands and feet in a very personal way, even in a sacrificial way.  I have seen and felt only love and a huge effort to be understanding and willingness to teach her things she could not have learned on the streets, and to show true Christian love.  There is no hole in their gospel-and no willingness to let things or people just slide by.
It has been difficult to witness.  It has been harder for me to actively be a part of their love and witness to her.  I am ashamed of being so squimish and reluctant.
Christ came to minister to all of us-the clean and the unclean, the rejected and the outcast, the rich and the poor-but especially to the poor, the "untouchables" of society, the helpless.  I have seen how that works-even when rejected.  A most humbling part of my "Lenten study."  They took a huge risk in reaching out to her.  My prayer is that the love they showed to her and Fernando will grow like a seed inside her greater than the baby girl growing inside her, and will give birth to a new and redeemed Mirabel in time.  She has taken a risk in accepting as much as she could tolerate for now.  Unconditional love, especially for those who never experienced it before, is a hard, hard thing to accept.  Love is hard to accept from human or heavenly sources.  My prayer is that she will be able to accept, in time, the love she is due.  She is a precious lamb of God as are all God's children, even when they do not acknowledge it.  It has broken my heart here in Honduras.  I imagine it also breaks God's heart in Heaven.  Yet His love is still free and available to all who will risk accepting that walk with him.  My prayer is for Mirabel, Suzy, Amanda, and me-that we will all continue to serve God, respecting the dignity of all human beings in new ways as we are led.  To be open to rejection and to risk saving the loveless, the homeless, the downtrodden and show that God loves his children and wants us to live with each other.  To patch up that hole in our gospel.  To risk and accept that my gospel needs patching.

Water

Francesca is a loving, generous and gracious woman, maybe in her 70's, who used to take in laundry for a living.  There are no social services here for the elderly, so there is no retirement and no safety net for the poor, sick, that have no family to take of them.  Last week a team of about 6, plus some youth from the Alonzo Movement did a service project for her.  (The Alonzo Movement is an organization of young people dedicated to teaching about Christ and preventing them from the dangers of drugs and gangs.)  Francesca has been quite ill for a period of time and things have literally piled up on her. Her tiny hut (maybe 8X10) was filled with plastic bags full of dirty and mildewed clothing she had meant to wash and sell.  Her ill health was now preventing her from completing this task.
    The team finished their task of emptying her house of unwanted clothes and junk and wanted to mop her cement floor and wash her dirty dishes and sheets..  But alas, there was not a drop of water in the house-not even to drink.  She had been too ill to leave her hut for some time and had no one who could/would get her water or to learn of her need.  The team bought her two 5 gallon jugs of drinking water and left her house cleaner than when they had arrived.  Sadly this scenario is more common than I would like to think about.
    An interesting thing happens here when the cisterns (called pilas) are empty-as they were this morning.   Amanda has found out that she can call the water company and call for a pick-up truck full of water that is then pumped by hose into the cistern in back of the house.  Then a pump inside the house pumps it to the pipes that furnish water for all the faucets.  The 2 big water containers in back of the pick up were emptied just now and it has gone back for more water. The cistern is only half full.  The pick-up truck has now returned and is pumping more water into our cistern.  The 2 large containers appear to be about 3X3X4-2 that fill completely the bed of the pick up.  I hope to find out from Amanda how much water the cistern can hold, and how much it costs.  Our household of 28 can now shower and the kitchen has plenty of water for cooking and washing dishes.  I can't help but think of Francesca and her need.  How different things are when there is money and resources.  Doesn't Francesca deserve the same?
    Because it is Lent and Suzy's devotional this morning  have me thinking about reconciliation, I am drawn to the image of water. A good symbol of reconciliation for me is that of water.  The Bible speaks eloquently of thirsting for water-in the desert, in our lives, and in our spirits.  How thankful I am that God's love reconciles me to him as water quenches thirst, and washes the soul clean.  How humbling to know that God's gift is free and available to all.

Lenten Discipline

Just how hard is it to put oneself in the place of another and walk a mile in their shoes?  How hard it it to forgive and admit mistakes?  Two stories this week illustrate the grace of parties on either side of different issue in real and stunning ways.
Earlier this past week a woman was angry over her child's getting sick.  She didn't really understand the  causes of his illness, and that didn't matter to her.  He was so sick he was hospitalized, and here one does not go lightly into the hospital.  At 18 months of age he could not tell how he felt, but the fever and dehydration were all too evident.  The woman was terrified for his life.  She made some threats towards those she held accountable.  The threats were scary and real.  Then Suzy sat down with all concerned parties and feelings were aired.  The mother apologized to the daycare caregivers that she had overreacted, and the caregivers and staff admitted that the situation could have been better handled.  Both sides made mistakes.  The big thing to me is that they said out loud and to each other what they did to hurt the other and admitted they were wrong.  Both prayed for forgiveness and wisdom in the future.  That takes major courage and grace.  And healing follows.
At SBV the teachers at the Children's Residence had a chance to air some frustrations with the way some things work there and not knowing fully about procedures and how some things are done.  They also had a chance to tell some successes they have had so far this year.  Although they all admitted to being so frustrated early on that they considered resigning, they all kept going and are now seeing how the children are warming up to the routines and learning processes of the school day, and to each other-teachers to students, and students to teachers.  Some children have some learning issues and emotional or behavioral issues that make for challenging days.  Others need extra doses of TLC to get through the day.  The head of the Residence and the counselor, both steeped in psychology and Christian love admitted that the school year had had a hurried start and they had made some mistakes in not preparing some children for the transition back to school, or, in the case of the youngest students, into school from a very limited living space.  It was just too much change too quickly for a smooth transition.  So all parties were able to agree to drop back a bit and start over anew this week.
Sometimes when we get off on the wrong track, how freeing to step back, examine what we have done, admit to not being on top of things and try again.  How much more freeing when people are able to face each other and say some hard things and still have a chance to begin again.
Isn't God very much like that?  Over and over we come up short.  When we are willing to examine our hearts and ask forgiveness, we receive it bountifully.  I think this is my Lenten discipline this year.  To examine my own heart and attitudes and be willing to say aloud I am sorry and to try again to start over.  Repent-change my way of thinking: stop, pause, rethink, and return to a right pathway.

Blasted or Blessed Balance?

We have had a bit of rain here in Honduras this week.  For many it is a welcome relief from the dryness and holds the dust down a bit, for a while.  Not all have benefited from the rain though.  Suzy's house, currently almost roofless, was not helped by being open to the rains that so many welcomed.  Still I was glad for the plants that were so thirsty for water.
Yet too much water can be so destructive.  The hurricanes here that devastate and erode so much land is too much.  The walls of water caused by tsunamis are horrendously destructive.  The videos and photos we are getting via the internet of the massive waves and damage in Japan are horribly mesmerizing.  Watching  a wall of water sweep away cars, trucks, houses, large warehouses is one thing-until you realize with a sickening feeling there are people in those houses and cars.  Old women and men, young children and babies, mothers trying to keep their precious children safe while they themselves are so terrified.  The waves of destruction that follow- fires, flooded fields growing this year's food, possible nuclear meltdowns.  The circles of destruction widens.

Several years ago I was in therapy with a very special woman who taught me many life lessons.  The one that keeps coming coming back to me is the dreaded, blasted "B" word-balance.  Finding the balance between too little and too much of any thing, the balance between extremes is not always easy or self evident.  How much water is enough?  The results of too little or too much destroys life.  Only the right amount is beneficial.
Likewise with other resources-sun, light, food, fuel, wealth, power, influence.  I believe Jesus came into the world to show us the way God wants us to live, to point the way to his Father God..  I believe Christ wants us to live and work and share and live and grow in the fellowship of community in God the Father, Son and Spirit, ever seeking the balance that brings us closer to the life we are meant to live.  The blasted balance word is becoming the blessed balance of abundance in Christ Jesus.
The teams that come to work here, at LAMB and elsewhere, as well as myself, wrestle with the question of balance.  We are blessed with enough resources to be able to come to help a bit, or a lot as our resources and talents allow.  The people here share their abundance of spirituality, of love, of faith, of joy in the Lord.  May God grant that our sharing what we have alllows growth in the Spirit and love of Christ.

Praise, Prayer, and Passion

We had a meeting of the teachers today at SBV.  We started with a devotional that blossomed into a full hour and a half of prase, prayer, thanksgiving and pleas.  The intensity rose until the passion was palpable. 
In the US we don't like to acknowledge, mush less talk about the presence of evil in the world.  It is much nicer and cleaner to just focus on God's love and our many blessings.  In the US many of us have much to be thankful for and so we can focus on the pleasant aspects of our lives.  As I watched the teachers singing and praying, and their passion rising, I realized they live in the midst of the results of real evil in the world.  They teach the children so affected by the evil in the world.  They live in the communities where the evil of poverty and all its many effects plagues the people like the plagues of locusts, flies, frogs, and bloodshed of Moses' time in Egypt.  Children are kidnapped and sold into sexual slavery, fathers rape daughters, children and parents alike go to bed hungry, promising young men are killed for a cell phone by drug users or pushers.  The effects of lack of water are myriad.  Yet in the midst of their cries to God for help, their faces shine with love for God, for each other, for God's many blessings on them.  I saw tears being shed, hands and arms raised to God as they sang and prayed so passionately, and I was moved to the depths of my being. I think this mush have been a scene familiar to David the psalmist, to Isaiah, to Israel in times of the Babylonian captivity.
I can't answer the "why" questions I have-that we all have.  I do believe God put us into community with and for and by each other to stand next to each other in pain, sorrow, and joy.  As Christ healed and taught, prayed, and blessed, I believe we are meant to take that example and do likewise.  To sit with each other in sorrow, to hold each other tightly in times of dread and fear, and to share our joys and blessings with each other in ways that become sacrificial.  To serve the needs of those in our community with the gifts and talents we have been given.

Who Are the Needy Ones?

I have just finished reading a book entitles On That Day Everybody Ate, by Margaret Trost.  She went to Haiti with a mission group for a week and ended up being so inspired that she started a food program to feed hungry children called "What If?"  One of the ideas she expresses toward the end is about people in need.
I have heard from various sources that our money would go further if we just sent a check and didn't spend all the extra money for airline tickets, room and board, etc.  I think that comment is made by folks who do not have a clear idea of what this-or any- mission is all about-which is about building relationships.  It is in working side by side and experiencing some of the living conditions, the climate, and the atmosphere and fellowship of others that we begin to truly feel the brotherhood/sisterhood of the human condition.  Only by eating the smae food, working in the same fields-be they construction sites, food kitchens, microenterprise endeavors, or schools, can we really feel and understand what it means to be in need.  Suzy McCall likes to point out that God didn't send a check-he sent his son!  Relationships!
In the United States, I have so much it is somewhat of a burden just to care for the things I have.  I struggle to find places for all the material things I have, and spend a lot of time dusting, arranging, storing, cleaning all my things.  Here a few minutes a day and I am set for the day, ready to go about doing other work at school or at Casa Lamb.  I think I am filling a need of the schools by bringing materials that they need and are happy to have in order to make learning more concrete and fun for the children.  Yet who is the needy one?  A real community is a two way street of those persons who are truly helping each other.  A Christian community is a group of folks, sometimes separated by great distances, who are meeting the needs of each other in Christ's name.  So it is clear about my mission to bring teaching resources to the schools, so the children can have a basic elementary education, which is one of the Millieum Development Goals we have adopted as part of our mission in the world.  But what about how that two way street works? 
After reading On That Day... I can express it a bit better.  I have a need to give.  It is a basic need that gets all too little attention.  Jesus said to do for others as we would have them do for (to) us, and whenever we do a service for others it is the same as doing it for him.  People here also have that same need.  Hondurans are a generous and gracious people, and it is equally fulfilling for them to be able to give.  So they give their love, and set an example for prayer, belief in the goodness of God, and trust in Him that is nothing short of inspirational.  The intensity of their prayer life, their praise life, and their love and trust in God and for each other is a gift of priceless value to me.
Fridays the teachers have devotional time after school.  Everyone hurries through tidying up their classrooms and carries a folding chair up to the second floor soccer field.  We sit in a circle.  A lovely young teacher (she happens to be the kindergarten teacher this year) leads the group in song and praise.  She has a smile on her face, her eyes close in spontaeous prayer and praise, and her voice is sweet and melodic as she leads the singing.  Then all the teachers take part in games.  Last week we played musical chairs.  The "losers" had a turn to look up a Bible verse and then say a few words about how it relates to love.  It was clear by their expressions how heartfelt the responces were.  Yesterday the games were blind man's bluff, and a "sword drill" that some of us remeber from other traditions.  You should have seen how quickly the teachers searched for the verses and ran to the microphone to read their verse.  The blind man's bluff game was to demonstrate how sometimes we as Christians feel superior to others who do not yet have the love of God in their lives.  It was certainly a good way to encourage us to be more understanding of others and not to taunt or ridicule or belittle them, but to love them into wanting to have God in their lives.
We need each other.  Some have a great need to give materially.  Others have a need to give spiritually.  With God's help, we can learn to give of what God has blessed us with and of what we have.  I believe that is a large of part of the "kingdom of heaven."  Thanks be to God for the gift of giving.

Caring for Those in Need

What do you do when you are so poor that you can barely feed your family and then get sick?  Health care is a major topic of conversation in the US, and my views on that aside, it is extremely rare for Honduran people in the country side to get to see a doctor.  My particular nightmare is to have major dental problems here.  But what if I were Honduranian and poor and no dentist to see-EVER?    A dentist that was here with the group for 5 days found out what most people here do-suffer in agony until a dentist comes into the village for a day or two.  Stand in line (very patiently, I might add) for a few hours, then go to see the dentist in a room set aside in a house being "remodeled.":   The patient sits in a plastic yard chair, opens his/her mouth and gets a shot of novocaine.  (Yes, the dentist very thoughtfully brought enough from the US to alleviate pain as he pulled teeth.)  A 90 year old man, with hardly a tooth in his head came in to see the doctor Sunday.  He said he had never seen a doctor before in his whole life.  He was a delightful man, with a battered hat set at a very jaunty angle.  He had a twinkle in his eye and he had a soft gentle voice.  An hour or so later he left, with one less tooth, a pair of red plastic sunglasses.and a baggie full of giveaways, such as Tylenol, tooth brush and tooth paste (yes, even though he had few or no teeth left) and assorted other first aid type of supplies.  His story was all too typical.  Mothers came in with children complaining of asthma like symptoms, several sore throats and earaches.  Many came just to have a tooth pulled.  The medical team could only give simple antibiotics or pain relievers, cough drops, topical ointment, and the dentist, of course had many toothbrushes and tubes of toothpaste to give away.  I overheard the pediatrician saying clearly to a young mother-no more soda.  His teeth are rotting out and he will have no teeth left at all at this rate.  Knowing that the supply of clean drinking water is hard to come by, I wondered what alternative the young mother had.  I think the soda here is cheaper than drinking water.  There is something not right in that scenario.  On the way out, the children received a small bean bag stuffed animal, a coloring book and a small version of the Bible.  Several people came in with faces that seemed to be worried or in pain, but many had smiles as they left, glad for a chance to see a doctor that  cared enough to come a long way from home to provide some comfort for a difficult life.  I loved to see the doctors and young people with them as they cared for the patients who came by foot so they could have this one opportunity to see a doctor.  They worked all day long tirelessly giving what aid and comfort they could as lovingly as one can imagine.  The words of Jesus keep coming to me here:  "What ever you do for others, you for me."  What an opportunity and such a blessing to be a part of this mission.

Heart break and Hope

Honduras is a place where many people live in constant hope.  They pray that God will provide and so are thankful when prayers are answered.  They pray as the Lord's Prayer models, give us our daily bread-for today-asking only that basic needs be met, one day at a time.  St Paul tells us we are the body of the church-to be the hands, feet, eyes and heart to carry the message of God's love and to serve our neighbors and love them as we love ourselves..  Each of us can only be one part of the body, but when there is a need we can be eyes and ears and heart to share the needs of those for whom we pray-"let not the needy be forgotten, nor the hope of the poor be taken away".Redactar
Today we heard that an 11 year old girl was taken in by the safe house for sex trafficked young girls, called She Dances.  Eleven!!!  That is 6th grade age.  I remember my daughter at 6th grade, still much more child than young woman.  It enrages me to think of an 11 year old in such circumstances.  The circumstances of the 13 year old with a year old baby by her grandfather also enrages me.  And my heart breaks to think of these specific two young girls in the clutches of such evil.  These girls need much care and love to overcome and change the lives they have lived so far.  The children of the poorest of the poor need the basic education they get at El Cordero and San Buenventura in order to better their circumstances in the future.  These girls, these children, are not statistics or abstract images of "somewhere in the world."  They are flesh and blood neighbors with broken hearts and longing eyes and souls that are desperate to know the love Jesus can give them.  What is my duty?  What is my responsibility?  What is my calling?  How can I serve them and share the love I have experienced?  Dear Lord, help me serve them as you would have me do.  Pray that we can find a way to give them reason to continue to grow, learn to love and trust, and hope.

Highlights of the Week

I have attended two special events that have highlighted this week.  Both are amazing examples of God's work here in this place of stunning contrasts.  Carla's wedding is a story of grace and hope.  Carla is a young woman, I think still a teen, who has two children, one from a rape.  The first child is now living at the Children's Residence.  While living at the Children's Residence (SBV) she found it impossible to adapt.  She is bipolar and the drastic change in her living circumstances were not something she could easily accept, despite the love and care she was given.  A child who been so abused often finds it difficult to accept the idea that anyone could care for them.  Although I do not know if this was exactly what she was thinking, she did not find it possible to stay at SBV and kept running away.  She was living with a boyfriend, the father of her baby son.  She was told by a patron of the home that she needed to get married if she was to keep receiving aid in the way of food and shelter now that she was living away from the home.  So Wilson and Carla got married Friday night.  Their current dwelling is very sad, but typical of many here-off in the hills, dirt floors, no running water, spaces between the boards that make up the walls of their house, and only one small room.  The only cooking surface is outside and the latrine is uphill from them.  Yet Friday night they were given a beautiful wedding any young couple would appreciate.  Full length bridal gown, many bridesmaids in attendance from the Children's Home, a banquet for all and cake.  All the children of the Home were in attendance, dressed up in bows and ribbons, fine clothes, and fresh haircuts for the boys.  The wedding honored their relationship and their relationship to God.  Carla was a lovely bride, though she seemed a bit stunned to be the recipient of so many gifts.  It was a wonderful example of the acceptance the children find at SBV.  All the girls, ages 10-13, of the bridesmaid party were beautiful, poised, gracious, and proud.  There was cake-a beautiful three tiered cake with tiny groomsmen and bridesmaids on a divided staircase with the bridal couple in the center. It was certainly a very special occasion and a remarkable gift to the young couple.  I hope and pray the the love they experienced that night will them keep in the days to come, as their lives will not be easy.  Most of all, I pray that they feel the love God has for them, and will find strength in the shelter of his wing.
    Thursday night was Ladies Night Out with the Atlanta team and others from the Charleston group that joined in.  The ladies are part of the Community Assisstence Program of LAMB, which serves the poorest of the poor in La Cantera.  They are elderly (some as old as 92), or single mothers with no means of support.  CAP provides food and other services as it can for them.  Ladies Night out is a special dinner provided by the Atlanta team, with decorations and gifts of  grooming products, and food staples.  Two women from Atlanta had helped them sew skirts and make hand bags.  They were all dressed up for the occasion.  It is one of the most moving events of my year when I am able to share in their joy.  The gift of seeing their faces light up with joy and happiness is immeasurable.  There are "games" and dancing afterward-silly things that make everyone smile and laugh out loud with fun.  Brightening their lives for a while is what it is all about.  Sharing their joy in Christ makes it meaningful for a lifetime.  For women who live in a constant state of hope, it is a gift of love.  For those of us who serve them, a lesson in grace.
     School starts tomorrow in Flor at El Cordero, and I am due to help get the school at SBV set up to start soon.  We are still two teachers short there, so please pray that teachers will soon be found so the children will not miss out on much more of their school year.  I am planning to check out the possibility of helping some with more furniture for the preschool classes.  There is to be a demonstration of a "typical" day in preschool on Saturday.  I hope to show the teachers some activities that can be done easily at the beginning of a school year.
     I so appreciate this opportunity to serve and share in this ministry.

A Place of Contrasts

Yesterday Suzy showed me a picture of an infant she meet in the hospital earlier that day.  His name is Moses and he has a huge growth almost the same size as the entire trunk of his body.  (See Suzy's blog at http://suzymccall@blogspot.com)  The pediatrician who was examining him said it is rare but treatable in the US.  Here?  Well, he has been abandoned by the mother who most likely feels the only hope he has is to be left there.  Without medical attention he has little or no chance of survival.  I don't know what will happen to him, but I am praying for that little boy, just as I am the little girl I saw dancing in the island of the highway last week.
At Flor del Campo, the school El Cordero, has a nursery day care.  Nurseries here are called Sala Cuna.  There are about 12 babies/toddlers in the big room that is neat, clean, and well tended.  The day care staff (two of the teachers I have been working with) obviously are very loving toward the children, and care for them very well.  I look past the lack of toys and materials to work with and see the love they are being given, the safety they have during day, the nourishment and know that these babies are the fortunate ones.
I don't know why there are babies born with serious birth defects.  I don't know why societies abandon the poor to fend for themselves.  I don't know why health care is lavished on some and denied to others.  I do know that every baby is loved by God, and for no other reason, I am compelled to love them too.

Learning the Honduran Way

   For a person who REALLY likes to be able to plan her day, anticipating each event and activity of the day,  and who greatly values predictability, living in Honduras is giving me plenty of opportunity to become as flexible as a former kindergarten teacher needs to be.  As I have been away from the classroom longer and longer, I find I am (was?) settling into far too much of a rut.
Yesterday morning I had anticipated being picked up at a certain time, and going about the shopping trip planned for the day in a given way.  Yet 30 minutes before the set time I was to be picked up,  (those who know me know how little I like sudden changes of plan) a different driver came to get me  Neither of us were able to communicate very well.  Eventually I was given to understand, I think, that there had been a change of plan and so I went to El Cordero with him.  Once I got there, I came to realize that the original driver was at Casa LAMB to pick me up, yet I was no where near!  OK.  Not a big deal, but I hated to be the cause of an unnecessary trip for a person who is already extremely busy.
The way ones gets anything out of a store here to keep your receipt in hand as you exit the store and at least one person checkes everything over-a la Sam's Club style.  I stood at the door of one store waiting for Brenda to finish her purchases, and yet, although I had already been checked and my receipt marked OK, everything had to be checked again before I was allowed to leave the premises.  There does not seem to such a thing as a quick trip.
Today I had thought I would be at school all day so I arranged for the taxi driver to pick up at 3:15.  Yet at 12 we all had to leave for the fumigator to do their job.  Are they following me around?  Another sudden change of plan to recall the taxi before the fumigation started.
Despite the fact that I have been here 4 times before, and here already for 2 weeks, I marvel at the way things get done.  This is a statement, not an valuation.  Yesterday as I went shopping with Brenda, the English teacher at El Cordero (the school) in Flor del Campo, I wondered what the message was in what I was experiencing.  I think it may be that I am still being shown that there are many ways to get a job done, and that there is no "right" or "wrong" way to do many of the things I get persnickity about.  As some of you know, I am very "picky" about a good number of things, and this may be a message that I need to lighten up and go with the flow.  Dare I say that I could become more spontaneous?
As I was thinking about the events of the day, I suddenly became more aware of the transitory life that Jesus lived.  Not planning in detail the events of the next day or two ahead, but rising to greet the challenges and opportunities of each day as they came.  Traveling about constantly, accepting the hospitality of people on his path, using each day to teach, heal, and show us the way to live in true community with God and each other.  The most important thing is not to have a life so perfectly planned that nothing is unanticipated, but to meet whatever comes my way with grace and openness, and to use each experience to the best of my ability to love and serve God and my fellow companions.
The flower is not concerned for his clothing, nor the birds for their home.  But everything is given to us as we need it by our gracious God.

Islands of Desperation into Islands of Safety

I am sitting in a lovely living room, enjoying a cool breeze coming in the open balcony sliding door, eating a light lunch after church at the Children's Home in San Buenaventura (SBV).  Burned into my memory is picture Amanda and I witnessed yesterday, coming back from  a shopping trip (one of three we made yesterday).  Because we had been to the Mercado, we had no purses, jewelry or anything else on us at the time.  In the small island  at an off ramp of the highway sat a man, perhaps middle aged, certainly very weather beaten and very dirty and downcast.  He sat near a piece of what looked like a shower curtain strung up between two trees.  He was vacantly staring out toward the traffic.  Behind him was a little girl, about 3 years old dancing in the breeze made by the passing cars.  Amanda and I both searched our empty pockets in vain hoping to find some money to give them so they could at least have a meal.  The image of her turning around playing and dancing so expressively speaks to her innocence and faith and trust that she may not yet be able to express that someone will take care of her.
At church today Suzy was inviting the children to come up and say how they feel God's presence in their lives.  Many children volunteered.  One said he feels God's presence in everything around him, one expressed gratitude for having won a prize at school, one gave a lenghty testimony.  Then one little girl, whose life has been dramatically changed since coming to the Children's Home said she has felt God's presence all her life-she is about 7.  Her mother is a deaf-mute who could not take care of her, so she and all her brothers and sisters are now at SBV.  She is a beautiful and happy child who knows God loves her and is taking care of her.  This is the story of the children at SBV, out of desperate circumstances into loving arms, in safety and in a nurturing home where they can thrive.
My heart goes out to the little girl living in the island of the dangerous highway-what a metaphor for her life!  Will she stay trapped in her poverty and surrounded by danger?  Or will she find her way into another island of safety and love?  We know she is one of God's littlest lambs.  We know God cares for her.  Dear Lord, give me the courage and trust in you to find a way to help this little child of yours, and keep her safe through the dark nights.  May she come to know you love her too.

A New Beginning

January 29-Nine days into this new life.  Already it feels like home, except that it is warm, both in spirit and in  climate.  Friday, the 28th, The Staff and children of LAMB gave Valerie Fowler, the American teacher and head of the school at the Children's Home, a rousing and touching send off.  The children sang songs and performed their own choreographed routines to the music.  They even performed incredibly complicated pyramid formations.  This was on a concrete floor with no mats or safety aids, and standing on each other's backs, shoulders, or balancing on each other.  The way each child helped the others was heart warming. Even the tiny toddlers stood around being adorable while "singing" a song.  Everyone so enjoyed the food and cake that followed.  I got to hold Yolani (the beautiful baby that happens to be blind) and we played pat-a-cake, and a few other finger plays.  Many of the older children compete for the chance to hold her or carry her around.
Amanda's new job is help get the new CASA LAMB started up and comfortably inviting to the various teams that come down to work.  We have been shopping nearly non stop for the many things the house needs.  If you know Amanda, you know what a shopping queen she is.  It has been amazing to go into everything from super sophisticated malls, a la US,  to the crowded Mercado where stalls and vendors are set up on the street and the prices were absolutely bargain basement.
At school, registration for the children took place last week and the search for teachers goes on.  We are still several short, so the full workshop that I will be doing will happen next week-Feb 7th.  This coming week I will be helping to get the preschool and kindergarten classrooms set up.  I will help arrange and set the  furnishes of those rooms.  Any leftover (?) time will be either shopping with Amanda (surprize, surprize) or working here at CASA LAMB to get it ready for the first team in February.
To see the love and experience the joy of doing some fulfilling work here is my deep, deep pleasure.  Imagine children in circumstances so impoverished there is no hope for a bright future.  Then comes the  opportunity to go to a Christian school where they are safe, cherished, fed spiritually and literally, and given the tools of learning that may help unlock a better future.  To be a part of this mission of hope
is why I came here.  Thanks be to God for this gift.